My Other Life

Out there, somewhere, and quite alone
is the other life I might have had.
I see it sometimes, fleetingly.
It looks so free and happy that I
sometimes wish
there was some way that I could
make it mine - to live it just a little while,
and put this present life up on a shelf.
(It gets so smug because it was the one
I chose.)

I saw that other life today
while walking past the shops…
quite unexpectedly it smiled at me
from where it lingered, almost out of sight.
I smoothed my hair
with hands that shook,
and when I looked again, my other life
had gone. Reflected in the window,
bright and clear, was the life I chose to lead,
and the woman that I am..

Again I vow to close my eyes,
or turn the other way
when glimpses of that other life appear,
I will not look, I will not look –
and yet, I think I will,
I think I must.