People Eaters

The jungle beasts had called a meeting
to exchange thoughts on food and eating.
A short agenda was decided,
the king of beasts, the lion presided.

The Leopard was the first to speak
said, "food gets scarcer week by week
and something must be surely done
before our sustenance is gone."

The Panther pawed a playful cub,
sighed, "it's very hard to find good grub,
I'm partial to a nice Scotch fillet
cooked medium rare upon a skillet,
but Scotsmen with or without kilt
are now as rare as ostrich milk,
and my dietician
warns never eat a politician,
for she says, they even make
human beings regurgitate."

The Tiger said, "Well this is true
but I prefer an Irish Stew,
yet Irishmen it's sad to say,
rarely come around my way.
My closest friend, a tiger who
now resides in Sydney Zoo
say's human flesh, fresh or preserved
is never, ever cooked and served,
no, not a morsel, scrap or bit,
he almost lost the taste for it
until a tourist neared his cage,
now tourist eating's all the rage."

The Puma shook her silken head,
"I like an English Roast " she said,
but Englishmen don't make the bungle
of straying in MY patch of jungle,
one really has to shop around
and search for every single pound.
It's sickening to have to beg
for just a simple arm or leg,
especially when one hears them say
that they would GIVE the things away."

The Lion roared - held up a paw,
growled, " I prefer my protein raw
and folks can rant and they can rave
of cooking in the microwave
but I maintain you cannot beat,
a juicy hunk of blood red meat.
Scottish, Irish, white or black,
they all go down a tasty snack
and one things certain, if I'M there,
I'll always get the lions share!"
He closed his eyes and off he dozed
and at that point, the meeting closed.