Getting Warmed Up
Light Verse by Don Tidwell

Word Exercises


Acrostics



Word Play


Limericks






	D regs of formal poetry
	O versimplified;
	G enerally found lacking
	G lib, undignified.
	E asy to look down on
	R arely earns a dime
	E ntry level hog-wash --
	L ove that simple rhyme.






	S lender ballerina,
	P irouette and spin
	R eel as one with music--
	I nspired from deep within.
	N ervous as a bride to be,
	G ifted, suave and thin.

	S himmering in costume
	U rgently appealing.
	M olded to the body form,
	M odestly revealing.
	E ver tuned to graceful poise-
	R obust heart concealing.

	A lways moving gracefully
	U nder gentle stress,
	T iming practiced leaps and jumps with
	U ltra-tuned finess.
	M odern classic dance forms,
	N eophytes impress.
	
	W illing limbs and willing mind-
	I nborn strong emotion;
	N urtured urgings, honed and keen,
	T alent and devotion.
	E verlasting classic artform---
	R estlessness in motion.





	K inky downtown eateries
	O ften sued for cause;
	S mokers there not exiled or
	H urt by smoking laws.
	E aters sometimes do strange things
	R ight there on the floor;

	D ieters don't like the fare,
	I nsects swarm the door.
	L overs fight and quarrel
	L ooking for relief;
	
	P eddlers in this neighborhood
	I n for strife and grief.
	C ops pursuing culprits
	K nackwurst served on grits
	L azy cruddy bus-boys--
	E pileptic fits!!
	S TAY AWAY!!





	M illionaire athletes
	A bound in pro sports
	R esplendent in knee pants
	A nd sporty gold shorts
	T hey work in their programs
	H eads high, bodies proud
	O ne pays to observe them
	N o freebies allowed.





	C rimson sunset fills the West
	A all the colors filter through
	L ines of radiant iridescence
	L inger in each lovely hue.
	I ncandescent rays of gladness
	O vershadow thoughts of gloom,
	P hantom ghosts of playful cupids
	E ase the pain of once felt doom.
	




	P antomiming politicians
	I nconsistent, weak and frail.
	C onstant flapping of their big mouths
	K eep reporters on their trail.
	L aughing hard at both their faces,
	E ating from the public pail.
	




	P oets write their thoughts on paper;
	O ften search for things profound.
	E mpty heads don't help the process,
	M inds sometimes go underground.
	




Superfluology


	In working Genealogy
	Be versed in your Theology
	And understand Biology
	As well as Anthropology.
	Now some view Genealogy
	As nothing but Mythology,
	Intent upon Chronology
	Pursued like Criminology.
	Reject you this Psychology?
	Confused by Terminology?
	Then bag it ... try Astrology.
	I offer no Apology.





Preliminary Bout

	Said Sammy the Sawfish
	To Stumpy the Swordfish,
	Let's meet on the beach
	For a tussle.

	We'll call in a judge
	Who won't carry a grudge,
	And he'll tell us who has
	The most muscle.

	I'll gnaw with my saw
	And be gored by your sword
	And we'll scatter the sand
	On the beach.

	We'll fight 'til we're tired
	Or the time has expired,
	Or 'til Barnaby
	Calls it a draw.

	The Seahorse and Ray
	Can then truthfully say
	That's the worst fight
	That we ever saw.





Animal Limericks

	Undignified limerick rhyme
	survives in an unfriendly clime.
	It flaunts all the rules
	about poetic tools,
	showing disrespect most of the time.

	But I believe limericks are fun.
	The form lends itself to a pun,
	and with subjects like these
	who don't mind if you tease,
	such concern seems a bit overdone!





	An odd sort is Emmet the Mole.
	Spends most of his life in a hole.
	He trots to and fro
	in his domain below
	unconcerned about traffic control.





	Depicted herewith is "El Toro."
	That hump on his back is quite sore-o.
	He needed a patch
	to go over the scratch
	that he got from that damned piccador-o!

	"El Toro" knows nothing of fear
	and for that the crowd gave him a cheer.
	He made history that day
	when they shouted "Ole"
	as he bit off the matador's ear!


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© Don Tidwell, 1953-2003